The schedule for the 500 Safe Harbors pin event is coming together (more on that in a second). But just in case you’re new to the Safe Harbor movement…
Safe Harbor is an idea that came to us from Great Britain (as did scones, which are wonderful, and tea, also great). People started wearing plain safety pins to signal that they were safe to approach, wouldn’t harm or be abusive toward you… that they were “safe harbors” in the social sea. I started wearing one after friends reported they or people they knew had been abused or threatened. They signal your commitment to treating people with respect and courtesy.
Then reports started of white supremacists wearing plain safety pins. So I, and others, started decorating our pins, taking back the symbol. After quite a few conversations where I was asked to explain Safe Harbor, and ended up giving up the pin I was wearing, I began carrying a few in my purse wherever I went. If asked about my pin, I’d explain the idea of Safe Harbor and offer the person a pin. I put them on old business cards in little gift bags to tell the recipient “this is a gift, a bit of my time given to you.” Thus they became “love beads” as well, an idea that came out of the 60s, hand-beaded jewelry given to express friendship and good wishes.
On a vacation, we met a young man who asked if I understood the significance of wearing a safety pin. I told him I did, and had made that pin, and offered him one of his own. Later, he showed me the hat he wears when he’s off work, with my pin front and center. He asked to hug me and said he was going to tell his friends about this. I determined to make more pins and give them away, spreading the idea of Safe Harbor.
I made 100 pins and went out to give them away, no small task for an introvert. I was prepared for it to take hours, or even to come home with many of the pins. They were gone in 15 minutes.
Now, I’m getting ready to try to distribute 500 pins in one weekend. You never know how people will respond, so I’m mentally prepared to come home with some of the pins. Talking to at least 500 strangers in one weekend sounds like trying to climb Mt. Everest with one foot in a cast (did I mention I’m an introvert?), but it’s happening. Here’s why:
At least 500 times, I’ll be spreading the idea of Safe Harbor. Tossing my pebble in the water and hoping some of the pebbles create ripples that spread. That people will consider, even if for a moment, that we have options in any interaction with others. We have the option of treating other people with respect and courtesy, even people we disagree with, or don’t like. If we don’t choose that option, it’s a choice to do whatever we do instead, because we could have chosen respect. People will have a choice of how to treat me, whether they accept the pin and hurry on, don’t accept the pin and hurry on, argue with me, talk to me, whatever. At least 500 times, I’ll be offering them an opportunity to stop for a moment and choose.
When I give pins away, I do not solicit, nor do I accept, donations. People can choose to go online and sponsor a set of pins to be given away (and get a set for themselves), but in person, it’s a gift, from me, or from me and the person sponsoring that set of pins, given and accepted freely. I don’t ask where the recipient is from, what their politics are, who they sleep with, or what they believe. I only ask if they would like a free Safe Harbor pin. This is an apolitical movement.
It’s simple, really. I’m advocating for what my mother would have called “simple decency and good manners.” She was a real fan of good manners. As a work of art, it’s about choice, and consciousness. That we choose how we behave and react. Mom used to say that how you treat someone says a lot about who you are and who you want to be, far more than it says about the other person. This will be 500 little nudges, 500 opportunities for people to choose who they will be.
I’m doing my largest event yet in San Francisco to mark the 50th anniversary of the Summer of Love. Specifically, I’m honoring the people who came together to help the kids who arrived in San Francisco with no money, nowhere to sleep, no support system. Crowds of them descended on San Francisco in 1967, and the city wasn’t prepared for an influx of unemployed, broke kids. So people in San Francisco organized food, clothing, health care, help finding shelter, etc. That, to me, is the real beauty of the Summer of Love.
Here’s the schedule so far. This event will be in San Francisco, CA on the weekend of June 2-4, 2017:
Friday, June 2, 1-2 pm : Haight Ashbury Free Clinic, 558 Clayton Street. Celebrating their 50th anniversary this year, they help many of the poorest San Franciscans. I’ll be out on the street for one hour, giving away pins. Feel free to stop by, get a pin and say hello!
Friday, June 2, 2:30-3:30 pm… meeting up with some tour groups on a Summer of Love tour. Wish I could say where, but the Parks Commission has asked that I not advertise. But if you see me, come on over!
Saturday, June 3, 10-11 am… oooh, another park appearance, can’t say where! Silly, I know, but those are the rules, so if you’re interested, check your favorite SF park and you might find me.
Saturday, June 3, 1-4 pm: SCRAP, 801 Toland Avenue. The incredible recycler offering materials at low cost for artists and teachers. I’m teaching a class, open to the public, $20 including materials, on how to make Safe Harbor Love Bead pins. People who take the class will also get a set of pins from me, and if you’re at SCRAP while I’m there, hit me up for a set of pins. http://www.scrap-sf.org/workshops/
Sunday — this one is still being confirmed, but I’ll announce it as soon as it is.
If you know anyone in San Francisco, or who will be in the Bay Area that weekend, please let them know they can come to one of these events, get a set of Safe Harbor pins, and participate in a work of performance art!